Following My Nose

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Periodically, PremRawat.com publishes first-person reflections from people around the world who are experiencing the benefits of practicing the techniques of Self-Knowledge as taught by Prem Rawat – a simple way to turn one’s attention from the outside world to a place of personal peace. This month’s reflection is from Llee Sivitz currently residing in Cincinnati, Ohio.

When I entered my 20’s, I had a job as a nurse’s aide in a children’s hospital. I worked the night shift and part of my job with these little patients was to take their “vital signs,” which included counting their breaths for one minute while they slept.

As I did this over and over again for a few months, a question occurred to me: “What is keeping everyone and everything breathing?” This led to: ”Why am I here?” “Who am I?” and “What is this all about?”

These questions eventually compelled me to go on a search to find out. Like the classic children’s story about the inquisitive little bunny who followed his nose, I followed my own nose from one spiritual offering to the next, looking for answers. Along the way, I met some very interesting people and considered some intriguing philosophies.

Yet, none of these people or offerings quelled the unsettled feeling within myself that there was something basic I needed to know that I did not know. And nothing I encountered seemed to go deep enough to appease that feeling.

A couple of years into my search, I came to the conclusion that what I was looking for was not available in my own country. So I began preparing to go to India to see if someone there might have the answers I was seeking.

Two weeks before departing on my journey, I heard Prem Rawat speak – not in person, but in an audio recording. What he had to say was very simple and there appeared to be no ego in it. I was moved by the kindness in his voice and, most importantly, what he was talking about directly addressed what I wanted to know. However, he explained it in a different way than I expected.

He said that I needed to experience these answers for myself, within me. And he said he could put me in touch with an inner experience that could help.

Once I heard this, it felt right. He spoke with such confidence that he could show me what he was talking about, and I instinctively knew that he could. Something inside me relaxed and the urge to search was gone. In no hurry, I took nearly a month to consider his offer. Eventually, I asked to be shown how to have this experience. When I was shown, I understood for myself what he was talking about.

This practice was my doorway to knowing the deepest thing I wanted to know. It felt completely natural. When I was shown how to connect with this Self-Knowledge, there was a recognition within me that responded with a resounding “Yes!” The answers I had been seeking so diligently emerged as a feeling – a wonderful feeling of being.

This was 52 years ago.

As I began to practice the techniques I was shown for turning my attention within, it became a place where I could anchor myself despite the goings-on in the world. I thank Prem Rawat, and count myself lucky every day that I didn’t give up on my quest and that I can still go to that place inside of me.

A major surprise along the way has been Prem’s incomparable compassion – someone who wants me to grow in my understanding. Since the time I received the gift of Self-Knowledge, he has generously continued to encourage me with his words and actions – helping me to remember the value of the gift of knowing myself.

 The Living Legacy (3:28)

Want to learn more about Prem Rawat and Self-Knowledge?

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